freaking.

totally freaking out.

i hate this feeling when i am so overwhelmed can't even study. [and i know... it only makes things worse by not studying.]

i'm getting it two-fold right now though. my molecular biology material isn't too hard, there's just way too much of it. i have most of the principles down, but all the details are just a mess in my head. is it s1 that does 5' removal or exo 7? or maybe exo 7 is the one that does both 3' and 5'? do you have to use reverse transcriptase for RACE, or is that only when you are trying to use RNA? are alpha, sigma, and theta the core components of pol 3? or is there supposed to be an epsilon in there? blah! plus my professor is known for his exhausting tests. one of my friends from the honors program told me that when you get out of his test, you can't move, you can't think, and you just need to go home and sleep for a few hours. but i won't be able to go home and sleep for a few hours because i have to start studying for cell bio. there's a little problem there too. i don't even know what i am supposed to have learned/be learning because my professor is so confusing. i know we've been talking about actin and myosin... but i don't know what i need to know. :[

no school on monday though. that thought is getting me through these days. i am thinking maybe james and i can go snowboarding this weekend. i want to go away somewhere [like san francisco] but i don't think it will happen. snowboarding would be fun though. :]

ok. well i better do something else besides just complaining on here. just needed to freak out a bit. james gets out of class at 5:15 and i am supposed to have studied a lot by then so i can teach him some stuff. ha. usually it turns out that he just teaches me everything.