home sweet home.

i guess.

i got sick during my much anticipated vacation. so it was pretty much ruined. i stayed in the hotel room all day tuesday and wednesday until we left. serious cabin fever. especially knowing the rest of the fam was out having fun. :[

my brother got sick on monday... then that night i started getting sick too. blah.

i was really worried about getting on the plane, but i made it through the flight just fine. now i'm just fighting a sore throat and uncomfortable ears, lots of coughing and just the general feeling of being sick. not very fun.

i don't really have much to report from the vacation. i guess a few highlights would be that we got dream fast passes again. i don't think that getting them twice could happen to too many people since they only give out like 100 per day or something like that. and not to brag, but i was the one who found it last time and i was also the one who found it this time. so basically, if you want to get one... take me with you and i will scout it out. haha. no, but seriously here is the key... when you notice that everyone walking toward you has one on... you are heading in the right direction. that's about the only advice i can offer. once again, my dad had just gone up to the room to read some films, so he missed out this time again. how sad. maybe we will go one more time and he can actually get one.

otherwise... we ate at the blue bayou monday night for dinner. that is the one where the seating is in the pirates ride. we had never eaten there before... so we finally convinced dad. actually... it wasn't that great. fairly high prices and our service was really bad. it took a really long time for our food to come and the food was subpar. they did give us free dessert, and that was actually rather yummy. haha.

tonight, james and i coughed our way through pirates 3. there were only a couple other people in the theater and the movie was pretty loud, so we didn't really disturb anyone. i really like it. i only saw bits of the second one, so i had to ask james a few questions during the movie, but i thought it was actually pretty good. i've heard little rumors that there could be a fourth one. i hope there is. just to tie things up and make a happy ending. [of course, if there is a fourth one... i doubt it will be as happy as i would like. ha.] so have you seen the third pirates? what did you think?

oh and just as a little update. i started working on the scrapjack before i left, but i didn't get the chance to finish it in time. i'm going to try to get it done tomorrow. my sister saw it while i was working on it... i was writing the journaling, which is about the nicole situation and my sister just said a shocked "wow." haha. well the page is called "rethinking this friendship." so that gives you a hint. writing out that journaling did help me just sort of move on. also i need to do serious catch up on the word challenges. i still have to do stop, my and now the new one... which happens to be new, right? ha. plus i need to work on my little fiskateer assignment. i'll be sure to post it here when it's finally done, but in the mean time, you should join the fiskateers. just email one of the lead fiskateers [may is my favorite] and tell them that you want to join. then they will email you back with some questions and stuff and then when you answer, they'll give you the info you need to join. it's a really fun little community. :]

mmm kay. that's all for now. i'm going to go crawl in bed. :]

oh. p.s. if you don't read heidi swapp's blog, then you don't know about this, and you probably should. www.clubheidi.com was just launched. it's sort of like a kit club, but if you just click on july kit, then click on ideas... there is some really fabulous stuff there. good tips and whatnot. i have the book that those layouts come from, but it's nice to see them highlighted here and see the other projects and ideas too. i don't plan on buying the july kit because i wouldn't use much of it... but it is indeed a great value, and i'm going to keep a look out for the future months' kits. [sorry alyssa... i know i was just trying to conivnce you not to buys kits. haha. but i wanted to post for the inspiration.]

ok. goodnight now. :]

so happy.

well i don't feel like i have much to write about. but i am happy it's friday, and even more happy that on sunday morning i get to leave for vacation with the fam. paul and amanda are able to come which makes me... you guessed it... happy. :]

the weather looks to be in the 80s. not bad, and we've been similar here lately, so it'll be fine. i just keep smiling when i think about the trip. i still have to plan and pack. we decided to fly this time. i'm still a little bit shocked about that, but we are a little crunched for time because my dad has to get back by thursday to be the expert witness in a trial. so in order to save time, my parents decided to go ahead a fly. i'm not going to lie... it makes me happy too. i don't mind being in a car, but it's just so much faster to fly. :]

i can't believe how much i just haven't felt like scrapping lately. i still love wandering around the scrapbook stores. yesterday i went into work for a bit and wandered around. i bought a few things too. but still. nothing. no creativity at all. i have a project due pretty soon, so i've worked on a few bits and pieces of that. i've made a few custom embellishments, and i've printed my photos and written some of my journaling for them. i think this will make the assembly process go faster. but i'm still trying to find the key element for the whole project. i can't find it and i think that's what's sucking away all my scrapping mojo. oh and when i was working on the embellishments, i stabbed my thumb with the craft knife. ack. it was a few days ago, and if i hit it just right, it still hurts. oh man.

so today i worked on my inspiration journal. a magazine came in the mail, and it just needed to be cut apart. it didn't really help the creative block so much, but it was fun.

oh and yesterday i signed up for some classes with kristina contes! i really can't express how totally excited i am. the store where she is teaching is about 3 hours away... and i think i have to go alone. none of my friends scrapbook really, and certainly none of them would consider paying $110 for two classes. and james... i can't really make him go along since the classes go from 10am to 5pm. he would be so bored! there is also a crop that goes until midnight after classes, but i'm not sure that i'll stay for it. i have to get back to reno that night because i will have to work the next morning. we'll just see though. :]

hmm. i don't know what else really. james and i had a yummy dinner at olive garden tonight and then watched about half of wedding crashers. his roommate was watching it when we got back from dinner. he was laughing SO hard. it was pretty hilarious. james is still really sick. i'm not feeling too well, but definitely not as bad as him. he went to the unr health center today, but they didn't really help him. :/ poor guy.

well. i was browsing around and i just saw the latest scrapjack. i'm pretty sure i actually have that page saved in my book of scraps on twopeas... i fell in love with it when i saw it. so i might try working on that to see if i can get some creativity flowing. i'm thinking a page about the whole friend situation from a few posts ago might be in order.

i hope everyone has a fabulous weekend!

the little camp out.

james and i are both sick today. my head hurts really bad and i've just been dizzy and feeling yucky all day. james is a bit worse... he's really stuffed up with a bad cough and head ache as well.

but anyway, i've been meaning to post this update for a while... so i better get to it.

so last weekend was the lab camping trip. i didn't manage to get a group photo with everyone, but we did get this one of just james, helix and me. we had a lot of fun. it wasn't nearly as bad as i thought. i do have to admit that we didn't make it both nights, we ended up coming home saturday night around 9:00. eliza, one of the other thesis students, and i were just ready to come home. i didn't get much sleep on friday night because helix kept growling at all the noises, so i felt the need to come home and take a shower and get in my nice warm bed. i guess it got down to the low 40s at night. too cold for me!
this was our little set up. james brought a big air mattress, which was pretty comfy. i took a nap on saturday, when helix was outside of our tent, and was able to get some sleep.
on saturday, helix took his first swim! james and i were so excited. his little tail stayed above the water. so cute.
james had a lot of fun cutting fire wood with this little hatchet. then he was determined to make a "spear" with it. he's been watching man vs. wild on the discovery channel. i'm convinced that is where he got the spear idea. haha. i told him he should bring the spear home with him as a momento, but he ended up throwing it in the fire before we left. i'm sure it made a good smore fire for those that stayed the second night.
james also got a little canoe lesson from claus, my pi. he went out a couple times and never tipped over. i have to say, i was really proud of him. he wanted me to go out. HA. yeah right.
my favorite part was the hammock. hehe. it was a tricky hammock... my pi's daughter, yumi, kept getting stuck in it because her buttons on her shorts would get caught. but it was still fun to have a hammock in the middle of the forest.
overall, it was a successful trip. now i want to go again with all my friends. i think one night is kind of fun. i don't really think i would want to go for longer than that though. but yeah, sitting around the fire can be so much fun.

otherwise, father's day was good. we just grilled some steaks and stuff. i gave my dad a box of his favorite chocolates. the same thing i gave him for his birthday. i wasn't planning to double up, but last week, he finished off the other box and said "good thing father's day is coming up, so i can get some more chocolates!" so i just went with it. he was happy, and so was i. :]

well i think that's about it. i guess i am just going to lay down and see what this darn head ache does. :/
i hope everyone has a good week!

p.s. thanks for the advice on the last post. i am starting to get over it. sometimes i still get a little upset when i look at his arm, and other times i feel ok. so yeah... i think i'll be ok with it one day. :]

shock.

james got a tattoo today.
i am in shock.
i am really upset about it.

he tells me everything will be ok and i am overreacting and getting upset for no reason.
but i don't know.

so yeah. just super super sad tonight.
i don't even know what to do.
and i have no one to talk to about it because i only feel like i could talk to deepa and she has a tattoo, so she won't understand. and with the whole situation with nicole last week... i just don't feel comfortable talking to anyone else about it because i think they will just be too quick to pass judgement on james. i don't want that.

i did tell my sister, and she said that a tattoo doesn't change the person he is on the inside and that's what's important.
he is still james.
so maybe i should try to calm down about this whole thing.
easier said than done though.

i keep looking at the calendar wishing this was just a big april fools joke or something.
:[

quickly.

because i am tired and my head hurts:

-james and i saw ocean's 13 tonight. it was fabulous. we were even considering calling it the best one of the three.

-my new glasses are still giving me a bad bad bad headache.

-i haven't been to the orthodontist yet. in fact, i haven't even made an appointment yet. i'm in denial and trying to ignore the fact that something needs to be done.

-i've had no scrapbooking mojo lately. i pass by my desk and don't even want to stop. it's kind of sad, but i'm just not feeling it lately.

-i did manage to buy a few new things while at work on sunday though. ha.

-on saturday i went to vacaville by myself. it was awesome. i got to listen to my own music and just have some alone time. so i went to a fiskateer party thing there. that was fun too. weird to meet people in person that you "know" from online. also weird when they know who you are [or rather that "you made that one page!"] and you have no idea who they are. ha.

-i stopped in davis on my way home on saturday. i met up with zach for coffee. it was really nice. i haven't seen him in a long time, so it was good to catch up. plus davis is so pretty at this time of year. a little hot compared to reno though.

-my sister brought home apple pie today from california. it's divine.


-the little he-man, as i like to call him, and i have been really bonding lately. i've been spending more time over at james' house with the little dude and taking him for walks and stuff. oh and he can shake now. it seriously makes me sooo giddy and excited when he shakes. cutest thing ever. i took some photos of the two of us on friday because i brought him to my house for a bit, but they didn't turn out that well. [read: i don't look good because i had been crying over the previous post.]


-i hope you all had a fabulous weekend.

vent.

yeah. i wanted to write about this, then i thought maybe i shouldn't, but i'm just going to do it.

today i was having what seemed like a good talk with my friend. [any other day, i would have called her a good friend... somedays i might even call her my best friend. but not today.] i found out today that i got that scholarship grant thing that i was working on a while ago... and i told her about it, and then i told her that when i told james he said, "i'm so proud of you" and that it made me feel so good to hear him say that.

then.

all of the sudden.

attack.

she said something like "yeah i've been meaing to talk to you about him..." and she went on to completely attack and criticize him. i didn't even know what to say, i was so shocked. she went on for a good 20 minutes without stopping and without me saying more than a simple "yeah." i wanted to defend him, but i didn't even know how to do it. i felt like most of the things she was saying were just completely baseless, and what felt even worse is that just the other day, james was saying how he likes hanging out with nicole because she doesn't cause drama like most of the girls we know. guess that's not the case anymore. i guess she got mad because we all went to lunch on monday and she was talking to me and he interrupted her. i don't remember that happeneing. anyway. i made an excuse to get off the phone with her finally, and i just burst into tears. i called my *best* friend deepa who knows all of us... not wanting to put her in the middle of anything, but just needing to vent. so i cried hysterically on the phone with her, and she listened to everything that nicole said and was in shock just like me.

ok. and because i can't help myself i'm just going to review and go off a bit. so be warned... this is going to get petty, but i can't help it. i am so mad.

she said that i'm too smart for james. umm... ok. i got all A's this semester, while he got one A- and the rest A's in the SAME classes [which were SAME classes she took as well.] so an A vs A- means that i'm too smart for him? he's the one who usually helps me study! and because i'm so mad about this, i just need to throw in the fact that her boyfriend never even went to college.

she said that james is rude to her, and she would NEVER be rude to him. now she didn't give an example, just made this blanket statement. i just know that i cannot recall a single time when i felt like james said something rude to her. i can blatantly recall her telling james he was stupid one time in lab and i remember almost getting mad for him because it seemed so uncalled for. deepa remembered this too and brought it up before me. [the four of us were in the same group.] deepa said she feels like james treats both her and nicole like they are his sisters, and that he jokes around with them and maybe nicole doesn't understand that because she doesn't have an older borther like deepa and i do. i think it's a good point... but honestly, there are a lot of things james could call nicole out on or be rude to her about, but he is really good about not wanting to hurt her feelings.

she said that his friends make her cringe and seem inconsiderate. ok. she's been out with them one night, and as i was driving her home that night, she said she was surprised by how nice they were. so. i'm a little confused. but his friends have always been respectful and nice to me and certainly don't make me cringe. deepa happens to be dating one of his friends too... so you can imagine how that one went over with her. and [here again with the pettiness] let me just add, that she met her boyfriend online. so they have "been together" for around 2 years or so, but he lives in texas and has visited her here 3 times. she has never been there to visit him. so she has never even met his friends. so how does she know they won't make her want to cringe too.

anyway. enough of that... it's not really getting me anywhere. the bottom line is that i was really hurt by her comments. i felt that they were untrure, and i would even say that they were inconsiderate. it's frustrating because when i dated garrett, we didn't have any mutual friends to hang out with. similar situation with dave. and what i took away from that was that it's really important for me to have some mutual friends with my boyfriend. since we all called ourselves the "biochem buddies", i thought that we were all friends. now things are complicated and i feel like if i want to have lunch with my boyfriend, nicole isn't going to want to be there. i'm just sort of questioning our friendship now. after talking with deepa, i don't think nicole was being honest, and i don't think she approached this situation in a good manner. i can understand if there was some honest concern about our relationship... as a friend i would want her to say something, but to just launch a series of hurtful opinions and complaints with nothing to really back them up and for no real reason just doesn't seem like something a friend would do.

well i guess in a way, it was a good lesson. i've learned a lot of things about how i feel towards james. i can honestly say that i'm not just blindly siding with him. plus deepa helped me put nicole's comments into perspective. and i've learned a great deal about our friendship too. besides... all i hear from my sister is how cute james and i are together, and how this is the happiest she's seen me in a long time. my parents really respect him too, which means so much to me. i shouldn't and won't let one persons nonsense have an effect on me.

mmm kay. that was a good vent! and i'm feeling some closure on the situation now too. i mean... the dynamics of our group have irrevisibly changed. there probably won't be anymore group breakfasts after biochem exams or lunches at newman's deli with all of us. sad. but i guess i'll have to just see what happens. i don't know if i should tell james what happened or not. i really torn about that.

goodnight. i hope everyone has a fabulous weekend.

noooooo.

no way.

yesterday, i went to the dentist since my widsom tooth on the right is coming up. i was missing one of my permanent molars on the right and the left, so i am supposed to keep my wisdom teeth to fill in for those... that's why i had braces, to pull all other the molars forward and fill in the gap that my baby molars would have left when they fell out. i don't have any wisdom teeth on the top, so i was told that i was all set. i wouldn't have to worry about my wisdom teeth or having any yucky surgery to get them removed. anyway, i went in and he took some x-rays and poked around and told me we have a problem. ack.

apparently, my top teeth way back there have grown down a bit too far, so there's not enough room for the wisdom teeth to grow in or whatever. things just aren't going to line up quite right. so he said i will either have to get my wisdom teeth pulled out, or the top molars will have to be impacted back up to allow more room.

NO FREAKING WAY.

i want to cry. seriously. i am so so so afraid of needles. and even more afraid of any type of surgery or anything. even just typing about it is making me teary. so yeah. i am just freaking out over this.

i have to go see my orthodontist to see what he thinks we should do, since he is the one who made the original plan for all my teeth rearrangements and stuff. but either way, it doesn't sound fun and i am just not a happy camper about this.

i have my final tomorrow for summer school. i haven't studied yet. no motivation. at all. but i'm not too worried about it. i have 100% on everything so far. haha. and the final only counts for 20% of our grade. so yeah. this class is a joke compared to what i'm used to. [oh well. it really just confirms that biochem was the right major for me because as much stress as it brings me, it's so much more rewarding to feel like you've worked your butt off to earn your grades, right? i love the challenge it brings.]

what else... today at lab meeting, my pi went over our plans for the near future. now that i'm waiting on my sequencing data on my homolog, i need something else to do. UMM. yeah. definitely have something to do now. when he was done talking about the work, one of the guys from the lab group who we work closely with asked my pi, "so are you getting a new post doc for all of this?" well. we are looking for a post doc, we had one who was interested, but she's not coming anymore. my professor replied, "that's why we have amy." WHAAAA? ack. it's going to be exciting, but stressful. i have a lot to learn.

anyway. i'm going to try to get some dinner and then study. i mostly just have some reading that i really should finish up. so yeah. i'm off to look for some motivation. :]

work.

my first day of work at the store went pretty well today. since it was their anniversary celebration, it was like non-stop customers all day long! i was mostly working on the register, getting the hang of the computer program and whatnot. i think i caught on pretty quickly. i also entered some of the new products that hadn't made it to the floor yet into the computer, which was interesting. the computer system isn't too difficult to figure out, it's just a matter of remembering all the steps and the proper buttons. :]

i really wanted to get my one little word page done this weekend, but it was pretty packed. plus i have all these different ideas in my head, and i can't work anything out just yet to get an actual page made.

on satuday, i finally got my new glasses. everyone tells me they love them, but i'm not convinced. plus they are giving me such a headache. i'm going to have to decide about them this week. the rest of the day, and the night until about 3am, was filled with celebrating my sister's birthday. we went to dinner with the fam and whatnot... then we went out to 210 N, which is like the new "cool" club to go to here in reno. [my parents didn't come along for that adventure. haha.]

so yeah. then today i just went to work and tried to work on the presentation for school. ugh. i have so much reading to do, but there just wasn't time to get it done. plus being busy at work made me feel super tired when i got home, and i just wanted some time to relax... not allowed though. my presentation is on tuesday, then i have a paper to write that night, and my final is on friday. i can't wait for this class to be done. [in case i haven't made that clear just yet. ha.] on the other hand... i need more time to get all the reading done in time!

i have to go to the dentist on wednesday for a quick check on my wisdom teeth. they are growing in and i'm in some pain... so we'll see what happens with that.

otherwise... in the in between time i have a lot to do in the lab for my thesis too. i just have a feeling that's going to get put on the back burner maybe. but there is so much stuff that i really need to get done. so i'm planning to go in tomorrow and at least get some pcr going... but i can't think too much more about it because i start to panic. haha.

ok. well i'm off to read now. i hope everyone had a fabulous weekend. :]